Effective Single Parenting

Do you know a single parent who is struggling with the painful aftermath of divorce? Probably. Divorce and singling parenting are quite commonplace. But, being commonplace doesn’t make it easy. Single parents often feel as though they have twice as much responsibility but only half as many resources. Trust me, it is hard work being a single parent! But, the good news is that many single parents are very effective. They have learned that single parenting requires a different set of strategies and coping skills, and they have adapted those strategies and skills to fit their unique situation.

Here are six general suggestions for succeeding as a single parent:

First, be consistent in your expectations for your children. Instead of feeling sorry for them and trying to compensate them for their loss, recognize that they have to do some struggling too. You cannot protect them as much as you might like, and the best way to support them is to give them the benefit of a family that is relatively stable and predictable. Prioritize goals and pick battles carefully, but teach your children that “no” means “no.” Also, in-so-far as possible, work with the non-custodial parent so that the rules and expectations don’t disappear when the children leave your home.

Second, include children in planning and decision-making processes. Share with them some of the concerns of running the household. Let them help resolve issues such as how the non-custodial parent should share in parenting responsibilities or celebrating holidays and special events.

Third, be careful not to make the children the battle-ground. If you take issue with your ex-spouse, be direct in negotiating a working relationship and obtain help, where necessary or possible, in the form of professional mediation.

Fourth, mobilize your support system. Ask for help when you need it. Don’t be too proud to rely on the support of extended family, friends, neighbors or clergy. Be open in sharing the situation and needs of your children with their school teachers and youth leaders. Your supporters may lack knowledge and skill in providing needed support, so, be patient in sensitizing them to the specific needs of your family and never expect them to read your mind.

Fifth, spend more time enjoying your children and less time worrying about them. Laugh more, play more, listen more! Find one-on-one time for each child and share your priorities with the children so that they understand when it is okay to interrupt and when their needs must be put on hold temporarily. Enjoy the experience of single parenting instead of wishing it away.

Sixth, take care of yourself. Become acquainted with your body and spirit and your unique maintenance requirements. For example, you might want to focus on developing meaningful friendships, maintaining supportive relationships with extended family members, developing a talent or hobby, engaging in physical exercise or other health-related activities, joining a single parent support group, becoming affiliated with a religious organization or obtaining professional counseling. It is important to keep in mind that individual needs are uniquely experienced, and self- care is a personal issue. The challenge for single parents is to become aware of their feelings and needs.

Bottom line — if you are a single parent, be resourceful. Make parenting a priority. Find ways to capitalize on the unique opportunities of your situation. If it feels to you like life gave you a lemon, then find some sugar and make lemonade.

Read More

Adopting a Child

The adoption approach, in primary phrases, is as follows:

1. Select the variety of adoption (domestic or global. You’ll find also open up and closed adoptions, for former involving continual connection with the birthmother as well as latter involving little or no acknowledgement from the birthmother)

2. Pick an agency or facilitator (like Alliance for children or the Christian International Adoption Company)

3. Entire a property research

An adoption dwelling study is usually a profile of the possibilities adoptive relatives that includes any one living in the home. The profile provides data in your romantic relationship, your loved ones interactions, your childhood and daily life experiences, your employment, as well as your monetary well-being.

4. Wait around for a placement

5. Finalize the adoption

Holt Intercontinental solutions adoption questions1. What international locations does Holt have inter-country adoption courses in?

Bulgaria, China, Guatemala, Haiti, India, Korea, Mongolia, Philippines, Thailand, and Vietnam. Holt includes a domestic software for Oregon people. Be sure you test the small print on every single on the overseas courses, such as the necessities, journey information and facts, and particulars within the age array of small children offered by country.

2. Just how long will it just take to adopt a baby?

From enough time you submit your official software right up until you will be united using your child ordinarily ranges from 10-22 months, and is also dependent on the nation you adopt from.

3. Exactly what are the costs?

Fees differ by region, even so, most Holt adoptions cover anything from $15,000 to $20,000 like the house study. This estimate involves most expenses except vacation. Getting your child escorted for you fees concerning $1,800 and $4,a hundred. In case you vacation to deliver your child home, we can easily estimate your travel costs within the time you utilize.

4. Are there earnings prerequisites for candidates?

Holt complies together with the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (CIS) tips for profits for worldwide adoption, or our abroad needs, whichever is larger. At present, CIS demands a familys attained money be 125% with the poverty suggestions. Poverty pointers differ for each condition, and for each friends and family dimension, starting from $15,612 to $39,462 in accordance to 2004 figures.

5. Let’s say I move to another condition throughout the adoption course of action?

Contact us promptly whenever you make your mind up to maneuver. Where you are with your course of action will figure out whatever you will need to try and do to satisfy state and CIS specifications.

6. What if I get pregnant over the adoption procedure?

At least one particular 12 months really should separate the arrival of kids into your loved ones. We consider it is rather crucial to permit the perfect time to regulate after the addition of each baby or youngsters. Right after this era of adjustment, a family members may perhaps take into consideration adoption once just as before.

Pregnancy will end result during the termination of the adoption method even though you’ve got been assigned a baby.Holt will not place unrelated young children with just one family at the same time.

7. Im not sure which nation Id like to adopt from.

You dont really have to opt for a country so that you can commence the process. You will be not necessary to build a ultimate final decision right up until your cultural employee is ready to publish the home review.

Same-sex partners and adoption

The normal wait around for gay and lesbian partners in fiscal 12 months 2003-2004 was 12 months, compared to an all-client common of nine months. The prior yr, gay and lesbian couples waited a median 13 months, compared to an all-client regular of 10.5 months. (From OpenAdopt.org)

Within america, California, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New Mexico, New york, Ohio, Vermont, Washington state, Wisconsin, and Washington D.C. enable adoption by same-sex couples. Florida is the only state that wholly prohibits adoption by same-sex partners. Mississippi, Oklahoma, Colorado, and Utah all make adoption by same-sex partners almost not possible by only enabling married couples to adopt. Critics of this kind of restrictive procedures also position out that in several with the states that have bans on adoption by same-sex couples, these exact partners are still in a position to act as foster dad and mom. (From Wikipedia.com)

Posts related to Adopting a Child

Tips on Producing the Profile of one’s Excellent Adoptive Child Choosing whom to adopt is often a practice that should take into consideration different aspects …

My Other Family I am the item of teenage intercourse. An undesired being pregnant. My organic parents gave into temptation, as young adults normally do. …

It is Possible After several unsuccessful attempts at in-vitro fertilization, my husband and that i have begun the process of worldwide adoption. We a short …

Point of look at from four adoptees. “We had been at a concept park whenever you were being born,” my mother commences.“They announced around the …

Read More